Kid Rock Might Be Running For U.S. Senate Because Everything Is Terrible

first_imgOh boy! I wonder what his major announcement will be! Surely, it’s not that he plans to run for U.S. Senate!However, the bid is not officially confirmed, and there are two reasons to be skeptical. 1) Kid Rock is a known flip-flopper. In 1998, the musician declared “I wanna be a cowboy,” though we have yet to see any evidence that he actually accomplished this goal after nearly two decades, and 2) As Consequence of Sound notes, “While Richie has expressed an interest in politics, it’s entirely possible, and likely probable, he’s not actually running for office. His campaign’s webstore is hosted on Warner Bros.’s website, suggesting the rocker is parlaying recent speculation into a marketing opportunity for a new music project.”If Rock is serious about running for Michigan’s Senate, he’d be up against incumbent Debbie Stabenow (D), as Kid Rock, though he identifies as a “Libertarian” (a.k.a. a Republican who likes to smoke pot), is a big supporter of Donald Trump. In the past, Rock has previously campaigned for the 45th president, sold merchandise for him, visited him in the White House, and generally just won’t hop off his dick. Ironically, if Kid Rock were to run for office, he may have to face-off against his good buddy, Ted Nugent, who is also considering running for office, because the bar for political standards is literally flush with the ground.[H/T Consequence of Sound] A few moments later, Kid Rock then posted this cryptic follow-up: Ah, yes, Kid Rock. What do you think when you hear the name? Do you think of the genius musician who heavily sampled the iconic “Sweet Home Alabama” in his song about growing up in Northern Michigan, or the genius lyricist who, in the very same song, rhymed the word “things” with “things,” making for an actually 100% perfect rhyme? #legendaryMaybe, your first instinct when you hear the name of the musician who penned such classics as “Cucci Galore” and “Bawitdaba”—the latter of which is mostly filled with incoherent babbling in between rants on the IRS and references to “porno flicks”—is, “Get that man into political office ASAP!” If you fall into this category, then buckle up, because you’re about to have a great day. Today, Robert Ritchie, the actual name of the celebrated and beloved musician that is Kid Rock, more or less announced that he would be running for U.S. Senate.A website for Kid Rock’s apparent senatorial run,  www.kidrockforsenate.com, went live today, which, I shit you not, only features a picture of Kid Rock next to a taxidermied deer, the lone phrase “ARE YOU SCARED?”, a link to a gift shop with predictably horribly rendered gear, and a poorly designed GIF that alternates between phrases like “PIMP OF THE NATION,” “BORN FREE,” and “IN ROCK WE TRUST.” Inexplicably, the GIF also features the phrases “PARTY TO THE PEOPLE,” “WELCOME TO THE PARTY,” and “I’LL ROCK THE PARTY” back to back, just to really hammer home Rock’s affinity toward both political parties and drinking-a-bottle-of-Southern-Comfort-and-waking-up-in-your-neighbor’s-bushes-naked parties.Clearly, the outpour about this new website got back to Kid Rock, as he then went to post on Twitter this:last_img read more

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Gary Lineker slams ‘amateurish’ England Under-21 team selection

first_img England’s Under-21s squad 1 Gary Lineker has criticised England Under-21 chiefs for leaving a hosts of high profile stars at home, after the Young Lions crashed out of the European Under-21 Championship.Gareth Southgate’s side suffered a 3-1 defeat in their must-win clash with Italy on Wednesday, leaving them bottom of Group B with just three points from three games.It’s the third time England have failed to get past the group stages in the tournament, and brings into question the decision to omit several established Premier League players from their squad.Gareth Southgate insisted ahead of his squad announcement that he was keen to reward the players involved in the qualification campaign with a spot in the finals, while Football Association director of elite development Dan Ashworth has since come out in defence of the policy.But Lineker disagrees and described the policy as “indefensible”.The former England striker tweeted alongside a link to the Ashworth story: “The FA attempting to defend their indefensible policy of leaving the best players out of England’s U21 squad.“We never learn. What a wasted opportunity to gather invaluable international experience. Exasperatingly amateurish approach!”The likes of Raheem Sterling, Jack Wilshere, Ross Barkley, Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain and Luke Shaw, though all senior England players, were still eligible to play for England Under-21s but were not included in Southgate’s 23-man squad for the tournament.last_img read more

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